With a 16 month age difference, we knew it would be difficult at first. Our hope, though, was that as the kids got older, they would have more in common and be better able to play together by being close in age. Right now, we have two boys, a 3 year old and a 2 year old. When everyone is in a nice mood, rested and fed, the boys can play together without adult intervention for 20 minutes or more. This is how I have defined the reward stage of closely spaced siblings. It began shortly before Jackson's 2nd birthday, and as time passes, there is less yelling and arguing every month. 
24 January 2012
Closely Spaced Siblings
Our boys are 16 months apart, as we 'planned'. There was a sweet spot between the newborn stage and teething where Jason was sleeping really, really well, and we thought, why not?! We knew we wanted more than one kid, and we figured it would be easier to have them in quick succession. After all, once diapering and night wakings and round the clock feeding and spoon feeding and all the other early life stuff is out of the way, would we really have the guts to start all over again? For many people, I have learned, it is far easier to start it all again, after a bit of break, than to double down and pile everything-times-two into two years or less. However, there is only so much you can tell new parents, and we had to learn on our own.
With a 16 month age difference, we knew it would be difficult at first. Our hope, though, was that as the kids got older, they would have more in common and be better able to play together by being close in age. Right now, we have two boys, a 3 year old and a 2 year old. When everyone is in a nice mood, rested and fed, the boys can play together without adult intervention for 20 minutes or more. This is how I have defined the reward stage of closely spaced siblings. It began shortly before Jackson's 2nd birthday, and as time passes, there is less yelling and arguing every month.
With a 16 month age difference, we knew it would be difficult at first. Our hope, though, was that as the kids got older, they would have more in common and be better able to play together by being close in age. Right now, we have two boys, a 3 year old and a 2 year old. When everyone is in a nice mood, rested and fed, the boys can play together without adult intervention for 20 minutes or more. This is how I have defined the reward stage of closely spaced siblings. It began shortly before Jackson's 2nd birthday, and as time passes, there is less yelling and arguing every month. 23 January 2012
How to Have One of THOSE Days
There are so many reasons why I have an hour or a day where I want to just check out. I let the laundry wait even further than usual. If we don't have easy food ready to go (and we haven't ordered in a while), I fall back to Thai or Indian delivery. The dishes become (compostable) paper. We watch a little television. We play a 'game' where the boys put me to sleep. Oh, how I love that game!
What I need on these days can vary- sometimes, I put off my shower. Other times, I put as many distractions together for the boys so I am certain to get a shower. Sometimes I minimize effort. Other times, I try to do something that helps us feel less cluttered. Getting all of the hats, coats, and jackets into the coat closet is one of the fastest, most rewarding activities I have found. Know what can slide. Figure out which things are secretly (surprisingly!) energizing.
I have found that by doing as much as I can on the days where I feel normal, it is a lot easier to have a day where I don't quite hit that mark. We will all survive. The laundry will always, always be waiting, but my boys are only getting bigger.
What I need on these days can vary- sometimes, I put off my shower. Other times, I put as many distractions together for the boys so I am certain to get a shower. Sometimes I minimize effort. Other times, I try to do something that helps us feel less cluttered. Getting all of the hats, coats, and jackets into the coat closet is one of the fastest, most rewarding activities I have found. Know what can slide. Figure out which things are secretly (surprisingly!) energizing.
I have found that by doing as much as I can on the days where I feel normal, it is a lot easier to have a day where I don't quite hit that mark. We will all survive. The laundry will always, always be waiting, but my boys are only getting bigger.
20 January 2012
Bookshelf: Mo Willems
As a reader, if I liked one book, I would try to read everything by that author. Sometimes I find gold, and other times I realize, 50 pages in, that I'm glad I get to take some of them back to the library.
Long ago, one of the children's librarians at our local library recommended Don't Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus by Mo Willems. Since then, we have been enchanted by so many of his works. Find them at your library, or click on the pictures to see the Amazon page:
Long ago, one of the children's librarians at our local library recommended Don't Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus by Mo Willems. Since then, we have been enchanted by so many of his works. Find them at your library, or click on the pictures to see the Amazon page:
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)